Relationship help, is this normal, please advice anyone?

Okay, just some background. I am 17 years old , never had a ';boyfriend';, not to say guys haven't been interested. But I definitely have some major problems and would love some advice. I am truly not a mean/conceded person in anyways. I actually have ever low self confidence and esteem. So please don't just say things like ';stop looking for someone who鈥檚 perfect';


1) Whenever I get ';involved'; with a guy I get REALLY nervous and scared and try to back off.


2) I concentrate on guys flaws, even if it's someone I like. Once I know they like me I notice all their flaws and decide I don't like them anymore.


3) When a guy and I get to the point of holding hands/ cuddling I kind of get turned off, and I like them less and less. It's like there not hard to get anymore. It's like now I鈥檝e got them, so now what鈥檚 the point.


4) I subconsciously talk myself out of liking a guy because I am afraid of messing it up.


I know I am still young, I just feel as if I am going to be this way forever.Relationship help, is this normal, please advice anyone?
i was your way and still a little am. you kinda want what you cant have,that means it cant hurt your confidence, and you are scared. if after liking a guy maybe a few days to a week later, you feel like you made a wrong decision then there is hope. you will have to force yourself to stay with him until your mind is done blowing smoke. i had to do that with my first bf(after highschool) i got those feelings like i didnt like him, and i was grossses out by him, and i knew i would regret it later. so i stayed and the first month was hard and after that i was cured (kinda, i have other probs). maybe that will work for you. you aint alone. but if you dont try to control your self you will be.Relationship help, is this normal, please advice anyone?
No; you won't feel this way forever. It takes time to be ready to have a relationship and it sounds like you are not ready for that kind of commitment- and that's really very OK. Go places whit a group of friends guys and girls and see if your comfort level doesn't increase. Just have fun-that's really what you should be concentration on at your age,. the relationship thing should be based on ';a need'; or because everyone else ';does';-Do your own thing!
You seem to know yourself pretty well - this is good!!


Now that it seems you know what the problems are, you need to work on fixing them. This may involve getting outside help. I would look into counseling. Alot of people state they don't have the $$ for this, but you need to look around. Alot of places even give free counseling.


It may seem like it will be along road, but lik I said you really know yourself and you know the problems - our like 80% their!!


Best of luck!
You just described a lot of characteristis that I found in myself a couple weeks ago. I ALWAYS would get tired of guys if there was no chase. I like a challenge. All I can say, is keep looking for that right guy. Once you find him, you won't get tired of him. Find one that keeps you guessing, that isn't always the same everyday. One with a little spice.
dont worry hun. I use to be the same exact way. and i know what you mean. like you already have the guy in the palm of your hands, so whats the point of trying anymore? well, you ARE young, and you have your whole life ahead of you. It could just be a stage your going through, but if you really want something, try talking to the guy you like and conecting with him. dont look for his flaws. everyone has flaws and NOBODY is perfect. thats why god made us all different, we all have our little flaws. but dont try to look for them. think of it this way: instead of looking for flaws, look for the good things in him.





hope I helped. (:
I know how you feel...in the way of the flaws. You can crush on somebody and once they like you back you notice everything thats wrong and it in most cases becomes a turn off. Im 22 now and married, someone will come along and sweep you off your feet...for now have fun, if you feel that way, then just play the field for a while, to you think you have found someone better. Maybe you need to find a guy that will make you chase him, but that also means cocky and distant which will most likely drive you crazy. Good luck hunny, it will work out sometimes and sometimes it wont.