I am a lesbian in a relationship, one in which I'm questioning if I should stay, I need advice Plz?

We'v ben 2together 4 4months.My issues r: I'm affectionate n she just isn't. She's affectionate only wen I am. I show emotions and analyze things in a way she doesn't understand and we both end up frustrated. Another thing is she's quiet less she's with her family. I can accept these things for we have fun together, she has a big heart, is trustworthy. I just wonder if I am short changing myself? I would like for her to talk more, to cuddle with me, she does N a very distant way she'll just rub my arm in 1 spot and dont move. I'd like 4 her 2say I love u 1st n kiss me 1st. I tell her this n she says its jus who she is n its not me. I have a bad self-esteem n wonder if it is me so I cant accept her answer; I wana know why she cant show affection? I think she's afraid 2 hurt me so wont leave me n I just can't leave her for It would hurt 2 bad. I'm a cute blonde, whos smart, wity, works hard, giving so mayb its not me? I also fear being alone not sur how 2 get over tht n should I?


~Thx~I am a lesbian in a relationship, one in which I'm questioning if I should stay, I need advice Plz?
It depends. If you really love her, give it some more time. Maybe it takes her longer to become acclimated with someone. I mean, it is promising that she's good with her family, so maybe it just takes her a while, ya know? If in a couple more months you don't see any improvement, then maybe you should consider leaving. I understand the frustration though. My g/f was the same way. I'm very affectionate, analytical, open, and I need that constant reassurance of love, while she was quiet, shy, unaffectionate, but perfect in every other way. The closer we got, the more she opened up. We discussed each others needs and made a compromise. You get frustrated when she is unaffectionate b/c she's not used to it, so imagine how she feels when you are trying to get her to be something she isn't comfortable with yet. That's the point my g/f made so we took small strides. Now, we have the strongest relationship I've ever seen and I wouldn't leave her for anything. I'm sorry you are having such a frustrating time, I really feel for you. I just want you to be happy and I honestly think that if you give it a little more time, she might open up more. Some people just aren't are perfect as you and me ;-). lol I'm only kidding. Good luck, Sweets.I am a lesbian in a relationship, one in which I'm questioning if I should stay, I need advice Plz?
it's a 2 way street..if she's not worth your time, then it's time to move on..
It is called a relationship. A relation is between two (or more) people.





Having said that, what you have is exactly what you have. Don't expect change because what she is is what you were attracted to in the first place.





Four months is really a short time. Have you moved in together or are you separate? What is the commitment? Wondering if you are ';short changed'; sounds like you are inexperience.





It doesn't sound like it is an affection problem, but a trust problem.





Answer: Relax and enjoy each other. If being together is better than being apart, you will know soon enough. Just remember, relationships are not static, they change over time.
you sound like a straight couple...
i had the same problem. If you're a lesbian it would be better if you told her that you loved her and hugged her and gave her attention more. You shoud do the first step. Trust me, she will love it. Does she know how you feel?
Well she sounds like a nice girl in my opinion because you've been together such a short time, and it seems she wants to take things slow. Yes I think low self esteem is causing you to feel this way about her. I also think you need to relax, take things slow, and just let her be herself. Remember that if you ever really want a relationship to work, you must work on yourself first, be able to make yourself happy, before you can make anyone else happy. Good luck.
I am speaking from my own experience-in the early days of a relationship is when u cant keep your hands off each other.For the first 2 years my relationship with my g/f was just wonderful-we were full of joy and love for each other-we didn't never stop loving each we just let people and things come between us-this DEC.-would b 5 years for us,but we are separated right now.but only been apart 3 months.


4months wow-y'all both should be so full of love for one another.Unless she is a very shy person and needs time to get to know you and learn you.Give her some time and don't pressure too much or you may run her off. best of luck.......
Most important: love is only found in tuth. if happiness is the resultant factor, all else is adjustable. one can be in a state considered by the world as a condiut for happiness, yet misery is never afar. the state of happiness is to be created by those directly affected by it, all else will coincide with time. look within you, find your own happiness. if you smile more than frown, it's damn worth it. ';loneliness is an opportunity to explore...';


-Zikky6