I need some advice - please be serious! It is relationship-related?

I have a good female friend who is in the process of going through a divorce with her husband.





She told me the other day that ';If she wasn't legally married, she would date me in a heartbeat';





We have had several intimate conversations since then, and have agreed not to rush anything - she wants some time after her divorce is finalized to ';find herself'; again - I understand that.





When I asked her last night if there would flat-out ever be a chance of us being more than friends, she said ';I can't predict the future, but I can't say no';.





She has also admitted to dreaming of me several times - of sleeping with me and (slightly disturbing to me)... she has dreamt of my ';thing'; - and at the same time, she has thought ';Omg, what if Frank (her husband) finds out? He will be mad';





I don't know what to think about all of this... I am amazed that she has admitted these things to me, and I would love for us to be dating, but I dont want to ruin our current friendship.





Should I pursue her?I need some advice - please be serious! It is relationship-related?
No....at least not yet. First, your friend is going through a very traumatic episode in her life: Divorce. She may be feeling like she's on the verge of being ';free'; and is looking to ';spread her wings'; (among other things). She may feel attracted to you because you are a man whom she trusts and feels safe with. She's going through a tough time and in her confusion may think ';Who better to have my first post-divorce/separation experience with than my good friend...';. You didn't mention what your feelings for her are, but keep this in mind: If you have ';romantic'; feelings for her, then ask yourself if you really want to be the ';rebound'; guy. If you don't have ';romantic'; feelings for her, then maybe you're OK with being the ';rebound'; guy, but what happens to your friendship after either of you is ready to move on to other people?





She may also be ';testing the waters';. Keep in mind that she will soon be single and she definitely sounds ready to mingle and is probably wondering if she's ';still got it';. She needs an ego boost and for a woman, there is no better ego boost than to know that she is still attractive and desireable. This may explain why she has made such bold sexual statements to you. She wants to see how you'll react but she's not ready to jump under the sheets just yet.





Let's go back to the attraction/trust issue, this may explain why she has had sexual dreams about you. However, keep in mind that in the world of dreams, sex symbolizes intimacy. The fact that you are good friends and she feels comfortable enough to share her troubles with you demonstrates that she feels an EMOTIONAL intimacy with you, and for women, this is often just as if not more important that sexual intimacy. What I'm saying is that just because she had a sexual dream about you doesn't mean she wants to have sex with you, but she may not realize what this dream means and therefore may be thinking ';Hmmm....maybe this means I should have sex with....';





What your friend needs is an ego boost. Maybe you should try to organize a get-together with friends and go out to dinner or somewhere where she will be able to mingle with other singles and ';test the waters'; that way. Compliments help a lot, but don't overdo it or she might get the wrong idea.





Good luck!I need some advice - please be serious! It is relationship-related?
Do not date a married woman and do not date a recently divorced woman. you will only be asking for trouble.





are there not enough single woman out there?





http://www.chick.com/information/general鈥?/a>
give her some time and space to settle her mind or youll end like a rebound. Take it very slow. If shes right for you youll end up hooking up
stop think run if she cant stop think then you better run she thinks with hormones not the Brain
be patient she is vulnerable, and going through a hard time. she See's you this way because of your friendship and trust and she feels safe with you, and in telling you these things. and in that trust she needs you as a friend to be there for her. if things grow and that's what you want congratulations.
Don't pursue until she is formally divorced.
Hey if it feels right, enjoy! But I do think that you should do things, slowly but surely. Take each day as it comes, be honest with each other and respect one another. If it's meant to be it will happen. Good luck! x
she's emotional right now as she's going throgh her divorce... being a friend to her is prob the best route right now as she is prob not her 'usual self' at this point in time. if something does happen later down the road then fine.. but its not a good idea to persue it at this stage u stand a high chance of ruining the friendship after she fully recovers from the divorce
No stay far away from her. She is in denial. She needs to recover from her divorce and a relationship with you at this time is doomed. I would wait a year. You don't want to be the rebound boyfriend.





Good luck!
the best relationships start off as just friends but think twice about it. dont rush it. she is coming off something major just be there for her right now and she will appreciate u for it.
sounds like a kids game to me...just let her get her divorce and take it from there....one step at a time.
give her some time, dont rush things or you'll ruin everything
Well, wait a while until AFTER she's divorced, otherwise her husband might use it against her in court when they go to settle their divorce.
My advice is to continue to be her friend and date but not to rush into anything more serious. She is in a very fragile and confused condition. Her answers show that she is not ready to get into another relationship right now, even if she doesn't realize that is what she is saying. She doesn't want you to go anywhere, you offer security at a very vulnerable time for her. You may not like this role that you have been given or may get tired of it after a while. It is going to take her some time. You will need to be patient if you want to continue to be in a relationship with her. Her comment about making her husband mad is a bit disturbing. Why would she care and why would she ever tell him in the first place.
Wait till the divorce is finalized. She sounds very ambivalent.
you already know, that she has an interest for you. You already know, she ';dreams'; about you. You have already had intimate conversations with her. Yuor answer, be the freind to her, that you say you are. Do not persue her. Let her set the pace. ( sigh ). And that ';time to find myself'; stuff. That's just about as good as hearing ';We can still be friends';. If she can't ';find herself'; show her a mirror. Maybe if she see's her reflection, she might know she's there.
I don't know, I'm sure she really appreciates having you there for her as she goes through her divorce, but I'm pretty sure she's not going to want to hop right back into another relationship. And even if she does, she should really have some time to recuperate and get her thoughts together. It doesn't mean you two couldn't be together eventually, but I'm sure she's pretty confused right now and even if she thinks she wants to be with you she is likely not in the right frame of mind to make such a long-term decision. I think you might get burned if you get too serious with this woman. Sorry, that's probably not what you're wanting to hear...but maybe I'm wrong. Either way, best of luck to you.
I will tell you what I told my friend.


She is getting divorced, so you do need to give her time to recover.


Don't take things fast, chances are you will scare her off.


and another reason why you should take things slowly is because you really need to get to know her personal life better. How does she act when she is in a comfortable invroment (like her home)


What really angers her the most?


What makes her really happy?


Things like that.


Be patient, don't rush and it just may all work out at the end.


One thing that you really need to do is pray.


Ask God if she is the one or not. You don't want to end up with someone you are not supposed to be with, otherwise things won't work out.


So the most important thing to do is pray.
I donno what to say...the whole story seems a bit weird to me.. in a sense I feel like she is playing with you because although she is telling you the intense sexual dreams she had about you, she isn t admitting she d want to hook up with u in the future. Why would she admit to that?! I don t know, if I were you I would pursue her. At least not now, she seems to have enough going on and uses you for amusement.





Try to wait and see how things evolve.
deep dick her!!!!
your right and I don't want to burst your bubble,but it can be hard 2 avoid these things! You just need 2 give it some time and then tink about what u want 2 do!
LOOK SHE IS GOING THROUGH A HARD TIME AND JUST DOESNT NOE WAT TO DO WITH HER LIFE.LET HER B AND WEN SHE COMES TO U THEN U PERSUE HER.
She's obviously on a rebound,i wouldn't advise you yet to invest any serious emotion in this 'pre-relationship' you should try and make her come to terms with her own feelings too.A divorce is devastating like a car crash, and most people in it are wildly grappling for an air bag, which more often than not turns out to be the closest friend of the opposite sex.She's seeking the comfort of something familiar, as she's just lost the greatest comfort of familiarity in her life which was her marriage.no matter what she says or does, she's not herself right now.So youmust hold off till she comes to her senses.when she's in a calmer state of mind and still desires you the way she does now, go ahead.


P.S most women do fantasize about what it would be to have sex with a male friend, so that doesn't count for anything
She does not know what she wants. Dreams one thing, consciously thinks something opposite. She's in turmoil from the divorce.





My advice would be to wait and see. It might mean that you'll lose her but she's clearly not willing to offer ANYthing right now,.. but not willing to lose the closeness that she's getting from you and probably is sure she needs.
my advise would be to take it slow continue to be friends with her she's going to need her friends if she's in the process of a divorce but don't take advantage of the situation if she needs a shoulder to cry on give it to her if she needs sex to make her feel better hold out because you don't want to be a rebound relationship. let her find herself again and if you two still feel the same it will only make your relationship stronger instead of losing a really good friend just for sex
come on man.....she's very vulnerable right now, and if u will rush into a relationship with her u'l end too into a divorce... ;) if she wants only sex, give it to her, only if is a sexual relationship ;) that she wants......
No I would not pursue it. First of all, it's evident she still has thoughts of her husband , as she said ';whats if Frank finds out?'; and concerns of him being mad..Why would a woman care if her ex would be upset with that if she has moved on?..and maybe she is just on re-bound..I woud let some time pass..that is if you are willing to wait.
When someone goes through a divorced they are going through a million different feelings at once. So one of those is ';If she wasn't legally married, she would date me in a heartbeat'; but like she told you, she wants to find her self and see where she stands in life, she wants to find out what she wants apperantly she failed when she thought she was gonna make it work with this one man so she has to re analyze her life and all I can say is have patience with her because in the end you will still be there for her when she needs you. She will realize or not that you two could be more than friends.





Don't insist on it because you will pressure her. If the subject comes up then tell her how you feel but just support her thats what she needs right now the most. Good luck.
Hello.....well first of all...she is off limits because she is married and you shouldn't be talking to her. She could get you into a world of trouble.....my advice is to stay away until the divorce is final.... better for you in long run.