Advice on telling my dad I'm in an interracial relationship?

Ok, I'm about to make some embarrasing admissions so I hope everyone can read this with an open mind. I've been dating a Kenyan man for about 5 months now, and I'm really falling in love with him. He's treated me better than anyone I've ever been with. I've had my share of bad relationships in the past, so I swore that I would never introduce another man to my parents until we were engaged, or at least on that path. So I only recently told my mom about him, and still haven't told my dad. My parents come from a small town, and unfortunately are not in favor of interracial couples, especially my dad. My mom's trying to be open-minded about it.


Last night, my bf invited me to go with him and his family to Hawaii for Christmas, all expenses paid! I really want to go. But that means telling my dad who I'm dating, AND missing Christmas with them. They're usually understanding about holiday conflicts, but this is a different situation. I'm really embarrased that my dad is so close-minded..Advice on telling my dad I'm in an interracial relationship?
hunni....if you are happy with this man then his race/colour should not be an issue for your parents, as long as you are happy and he is happy that's all that matters.. if they see that your happy then they should be happy for you....just go and tell them that you have been seeing this great guy for months now but didn't want to tell them until you knew that he was right for you, you should not be embarrassed about this, just tell them and hope that they give you their blessings...tell them how happy you are and how well this guy treats you...i wish you all the luck in the world, this guy sounds lovely...good luck...Advice on telling my dad I'm in an interracial relationship?
If you're really serious about this guy, you're going to have to tell him eventually. His reactions are his own, you can't be responsible for that.





As far as Christmas, maybe talk to your mom first to see how well it would go over? Some families don't mind celebrating on a different day, and some families think it's really important to be together on that specific day. You'll have to decide that with them...
If possible,u can have a good talk with your father,find the real reason why he is so close-minded,but not mention your interracial dating.Then,introduce the guy to your farther as just a friend of yours by accident,see your father likes him or not....I think your father love u and hope you will be happy in the future,why not have a try to let your father understand you?When i was first in an interracial relationship on interracialmatch.com ,I have met the same problem.Unforturnately,I broke up with the guy in the end.Good luck to you.
Basically you should not go away on vacation with this guy till your married. You if your serious about this guy need to talk to your dad. You need to stand up for what you believe in. Unless your unsure. You need to talk to this guy and ask him what his intents are about your relationship..If he plans on taking it futher then just boy friend and girl friend.
Just tell him...Dad I've been seeing this really wonderful Man, he treats me very well and I'm happier than I've ever been in a relationship. Now I know how you feel about interracial relationships, but my happiness should be more important than the color of his skin. Dad I know you love me enough to open your mind to this and thank you for raising me to not settle for any Man but to insist on the best.


Do not give him a chance to speak until your finished.
Ask Tucker Chapman.
Don't tell them. Just don't have anything to do with them anymore.
Oh come on we are in 2007 mixed children fit in anywhere unless you live in a small town where a donut shop is disturbing their peace. Come on. I would tell your father that I love this man and I want you to welcome him as he is a good man. Missing Christmas ohhhh that is a toughie after such a short relationship you may get some flack. I would rethink that one. But accepting this guy if you love him then you are going to be strong enough to defend him and your feelings for him. If you cant then you are not a strong enough woman and what can I tell you? Dad has to either get out of the dark ages or loose you. That would be my issue. You can see how foolish small minded people are and uneducated. Rise above racism take a stand you will be a better person for it.
for this reason a husband leaves his mother and a woman leaves her home.


the primary reason for a relationship is to create love so beautiful, the world sees true unselfish loves is. The most valuable thing in life is not things or power and prestige. No the most valuable thing in life is meaningful relationship. Relationships that helps to define us and make us blossom. We should honor our parents, but it is not honoring them to do that which is not right as an ADULT, You are now responsible for your destiny and the choices you now make, or allow others to make will impact that.


So explain to your father in great detail, with examples how this relationship benefits and fulfills you. Your purpose is not to make your father wrong but to allay his fears and concerns. Not all black men are irresponsible, some are knights in shining armor.
My mom was not so pleased with my bf when she met him. I had a two fold problem: he is wht and he's from a different class (';lower'; than my own). I'm super close to my mother and I usually take her advice but this was a situation where I had to be an adult and let her know that I have to make my own decisions in life just as she made hers. Now, he wasn't the first wht guy that I had dated so I was a bit surprised by her reaction but she recognized it as a serious relationship and that got her dander up.





You already told your mother and it sounds like they're not ';racist'; per se, just feel that you should ';stick with your own'; when it comes to romantic relationships because of the generation that they are from and the way that they see the world. This is hopeful because it means that they're not going to reject him out of hand and will probably come around if/when things become super serious. The only thing for it at the moment is to just tell him [your father] and let him meet him [your bf]. See if they are willing to come to you for Thanksgiving or some small holiday celebration that you can have with them before you go off to Hawaii. That way, you don't have to take him to your parents town and your parents will have an oppotunity to see that it's not as big of a deal as they think it is in your environment. Maybe let him talk to your father on the phone if that isn't possible. You have your mother on your side as I had my father on mine and that makes a huge difference in the outcome.





You shouldn't be embarrassed about your fathers opinions. You have nothing to do with them and he's a product of his generation/environment as are we all.





Good luck.
its your life, its your love, there are almost no problems with inter-racials kids this day in age because just about everyone is inter-racial which makes racism all that more confusing.





anyway, just tell him, and keep on talking to him about it over time. sooner or later he will ether have to deal with it or just stay out of your love life
You should tell your dad but I understand how much of a challenge this may be for you, so if for what ever reason you can't tell your dad. Have your mom tell your dad. Your mom is already aware of the situation and she has been keeping your secret so she's on your side and if you want to go to Hawaii with your BF then go. Life is really short and this ultimately is your life...start living it.








As far as the kids excuse, that's got to be theoldest and lamest cop out out there. Not to mention all the problems kids today are having regardless of if they are white or not. Kids are being preyed on and raped and molested bu adults at an alarming rate and those adults aren't snatching up bi-racial kids, they are going for white kids. At the CMA awards Kellie Pickler basically broke down in song because of her mom abandoning her as a kid and they are all white. So do not let anyone push that lame *** excuse on you about it's abotu the kids, obviously noone gives a crap about the kids these days.
I think that you should go on vacation and enjoy yourself with your BF. Your father just has to deal with it that your dating out of your race. You can't help who you fall in love with and he has to understand that. Maybe you could have your dad come to dinner with you and your BF so that way he can't scream or rant about him being Kenyen. If your mom is ok with it, I think she could smooth things over with your dad. Be happy live free, life is to short to make excuses for what you want and your dad has to come to his senses and be open minded.








Oh and by the way I'm Puerto Rican not Mexican..You answered my question earlier and said ';the mexican girl'; and i just wanted to clarify that...maybe stupid to some people but i'm not afraid to correct people.