Please help! my relationship is so painful because of something i don't understand, advice?

if you take the time to read this an help me ill be sososo thankful%26lt;3





my boyfriend and i have been rocky for a couple weeks now, just constant nights where we bicker. before the fights we were both very understanding and we complement eachother very well, and were very open and always took contructive critisim from eachother, we made eachother better and stronger when need be.








but out side our relationship he was having family problems, his whole childhood was very messed up and now things between his family is rough, he got in a bad fight one fight with his mom, and he tried to kill him self, he spend a day in the hospital and i remember the sick feeling i had cause the whole day i knew some thing was wrong cause i didnt talk to him all day, then that night he got home i was up worried and he finaly texted me, he told me what happened and i broke down and he told me how he can do this with out me and he cant lose me and he needs me to be there for him to help him with this, but it hurt so bad to know if he did kill hims self id be alone. it was all so hurt full but we talked for hours and it all lead down to the deepest phone call of my life, after it all we both were in this and we were stronger then ever.





but since that night he hasnt been the same, he doesnt laugh or joke as much, rarly ever compared to before. i miss who he was and i dont know how or why hes changed, the other night he told me that i need to stop saying really cute sweet things cause he doesnt like it when before thats so much of what came out of him mouth, i have more saved messages then i can count from him saying what he told me not to. he tells me im immature for no reason, the other night he sent me a cute picture text of him and i said ';mineminemine'; which ive always said cause its an inside joke form the begining of our realationship and he yelled at me and told me i was being immmature and i just dont understand what i did, i have to question everything i say cause the wierdest things set him off like if i put a %26lt;3 in a text or im not saying what he wants or im just in a lame mood from a hard day, even things that make no sence, for examle ';my day felt so long, how was yours?';





he tells me what i can do to help but he KNOWS all the things he tells me i can do just arnt me, and im try but all my friends are worried cause its altering who i am and my state of mind.


but i am falling in love with him, and theres no way i can walk away now, im in this. please help me and give me some advice on what i can to do stop the fights, be a better girlfriend with out going to be crying everynight.how can i just make him happy. please help.





thank you so much%26lt;3Please help! my relationship is so painful because of something i don't understand, advice?
I hope there is not another chapter because I fell asleep while reading this one.Please help! my relationship is so painful because of something i don't understand, advice?
your boyfriend is mentally ill


he needs to be under a care of a dr


he is not the person who you think he is





i can only advise you to be careful with your heart here because obviously he is ill but you don't see it





your relationship will never be like it once was.. that part of the dating cycle is over


the question is


are you willing to date a mentally ill person?
I'm sorry for your predicament. It sounds like he's going through some kind of change and doesn't know how to cope. I think the best thing for him is patience and love and space. Give him a lot of space and let him realize what he needs. Don't be sad because you think you're doing something wrong - because you're not. Be the strong one, without being clingy and worrysome, and just let him know you're there for him with your actions. Appreciate him and try to understand where his anxiety and depression is coming from. Good luck! And don't stress - that's not what either of you need.





And btw, the first poster is a complete asss.
You can't love him enough or be a good enough girlfriend to fix his problems - they have nothing to do with you.





The best thing to do right now is for you to walk away from the situation. He has to work out his problems, either on his own or with professional help. It's not your burden to carry and the best thing you can do for him is to step aside and let him deal with him.





I know this is hard, but you can't solve it.





((hugs))
He is making his problems your problems. He's making you walk on egg shells. What he's doing to you is emotionally unhealthy. Try to look at this objectively. What advice would you give your daughter (just pretend you have one) is she came to you with this problem? Now, follow that advise.
I know that exact feeling, my ex changed and has always been like that to this day %26amp; i wish i could have that back. You've got to tell him how you feel. Scare him with the thought that you might leave if he carries on the way he has, it might give him a bit of a wake up call.





You sound as tho your doing everything you can. Your being yourself and hes trying to change you into someone you arent. Sounds like hes angry about something, and hes taking everything out on you by putting you down. Dont change who you are for anybody. No matter how much you love them.





Good luck pet x
Wow sweetie you are not alone to a point, look I am not a doctor or anything like that but, you need some help or rather your boyfriend needs some help, I am not for sure what may have happened the night he told you he was in the hospital for trying to kill himself,I will not say nothing bad about your guy because I do not know him nor you personally but, I know guys and it sounds like he is not the same guy you fist met, he has changed and you haven't so you still see the man you fell in love with, and from the sounds of it he is no longer there, and if you love who you are then you must have to decide who you love more, yourself or him?


If he is trying to get you to act in some way that is not you and you are not happy with that then you must decide if you want to be with him that bad. sometimes we as women tend to lose ourselves in a man that is not worthy of our love so then we have to make a choice you have a lot on your mind and no one here can really tell you what to do with your life so there is really know way to make him happy he has to want it for himself......I hope this helps somewhat Good Luck


Lil Angel.....
Aww sorry this is happening to you!





It seems as if he is very depressed about something, when your depressed even the smallest thing will irritate you.





If its got to the point of him trying to kill himself its time to seek some help, maybe go with him to see someone to discuss whats bothering him, Just be careful on how you approach him because he might be in denial and it will make matters worst, he needs to see someone or at least talk about his issues and try to get them resolved.





Wish you the best of luck.
sorry was not really bothered reading the whole thing.. so I read the first few lines and then the end..





umm don't do anything.. just see him and talk to him...


there's much you can do anyways..
Your bf sound very very depressed. and he needs professional help.


now when men are soo depressed like this, they will normally not accept going to a psychologist, so I think maybe you should go to a psychologist and ask him what you can do for him, or how you can persuade him to go with you.


I dont think we in yahoo answers can help as much as a psycologist could, because he is so depressed that he even almost killed himself.





All I can say is that he is not hurting you on purpose, he is doing it because he is hurt, and he doesnt even know how muc he is hurting you.





Also he needs you now more than any other time, if he was always sweet and nice, thats how he wants to be, and now he just cant be that because h is really depressed.
have you ever been through something like what he is dealing with? It can really screw up a persons outlook on life. The best thing you can do is just be there for him, let him know that you care and eventually he will be okay; he's probably still a little (or a lot) shaken up
im thinking that all of these problems r caused by the fight with his mother and the fact that he tried to commit suicide. so the best solution is to give him some time to bring back together his life and u should open up with him and tell him you will always be there for him. Good luck!!!